I’m not sure how this came up, but the other day a friend of mine who happens to be a parent told me kids really don’t date anymore. He says they hang out and do things in groups but the pairing off we used to see when we were kids ( I’m talking to all you Gen-X’ers out there ) is pretty much a thing of the past.
That got me to thinking about dating. I remember as a teen, and more as an adult, the fun and excitement of dating. The anticipation towards going out on that Friday or Saturday night with that someone special. I can remember when I first started dating Sharon. While I was into my work here at WTAE back in 1998 when we first went out, Fridays could not arrive soon enough.
I would call her during the week and tell her we would be going somewhere secret – somewhere special. From there, I would make plans – be it dinner, dancing, whatever. I would not tell her and then we would go out on that date. I would pick her up and we were off for a night of fun and romance.
Sharon and yours truly on a date night last summer
I miss those days. Let’s be honest, dating is a different animal when you are married to that person. Much of the fun of dating is the mystery. You are still learning about that person and what makes them tick. You are riding an emotional high when you first date. Once you get married, you tend to know everything about that person – and probably a thing or two you would rather not.
So can you be married and date? Of course you can, but it just takes a little more work. I have discovered that with Sharon it’s not the grand night on the town, rather the small things that seem to bring her joy. It’s not flowers, but maybe a nice written note. It’s not a declaration of love, but rather a phone call to say “hi”. Most of all, it’s not about spending money and taking her to the most lavish place in town, but rather trying a new place around the corner as we did last weekend.
No, you can never date the way you once did — but why would you? You know this person now, so date night feels different so why not approach it differently? Of course, there is still some mystery there … as there will always be Sharon and I.