Senators McCain and Obama: You can stop spending millions on TV ads. You can stop flooding me with junk mail about how you want my donation and my vote. Frankly, I can stop watching non-stop campaign coverage on the cable networks. You can stop all this because I have decided how I will vote in the Presidential election this fall.
I’m voting for Paris Hilton.
No, I’m not kidding.
After much consideration and analysis – and one very impressive spoof of a campaign commercial – Paris Hilton has put herself over the top as far as I am concerned.
So why, you might be wondering, am I backing a woman I have always described as “superficial” and “a media creation”? Quite simply, she put out the most entertaining and the most informative campaign ad we have seen. It’s sure to go down in the annals of political history along with LBJ’s “Daisy Girl” spot and the first George Bush’s “Willie Horton” ad. It’s compelling, interesting and a YouTube sensation.
Who could have guessed the hotel heiress would re-energize the race for President?
OK, I am kidding somewhat here but I’m not. This has been the least inspiring Presidential campaign I can remember. It’s sniping back and forth with endless discussion about what really amounts to nothing. It makes me long for the days of the democratic primary when Hillary and Barack actually kept my interest and made me believe there was a real debate going on.
Suddenly, Paris Hilton shows up in a bikini and not only takes jabs at John McCain and what amounted to a waste of money ( His spot painting Barack Obama as a “celebrity”. Hardly a reason not to elect someone President ), but also provides the only “straight talk” we have witnessed in this campaign. Hilton suggested a “hybrid” of the energy policies of both Obama and McCain. “Problem solved” in her words.
Of course, there are only two things which have me hedging my bets on Paris for President. First, if she makes the mistake of naming Nicole Ritchie as her vice-president. While I like Paris’ simple solutions, I don’t need to see “The Simple Life” again.
Second, and this might be the bigger problem, Paris is not old enough to be President. You have to be 35. Oh well, I guess I can always save my “Paris for President”: but for 2024.