Missing the Mark

It’s obvious no one in any position of authority reads my blog. If they did, I would soon run out of material because they would realize how silly and stupid some of the things that pass for popular culture and political discussion really are.

Case in point, the on-going Miss California “scandal” in which Carrie Prejean apparently lost her shot at the crown when one of the judges asked her  a question about gay marriage. Her answer was honest. She said she believed marriage was only between a man and a woman.

Since that statement, she has been trounced on in blogs, been put in the middle of  a national culture war, become the spokesperson for a pro-heterosexual marrigae group and now, the latest foil for Donald Trump who today “decided” she should keep her Miss California crown. ( By the way, Ms Prejean came in second in the Miss USA Pageant. Does anybody remember who won? There’s another casualty in all this. )

This controversy is not only silly, but also  inherently sexist. Do you really think this woman would have been given the national spotlight if she expressed her opinion anywhere other than during the final segment of a  beauty pageant following the bikini competition? After all, the  only video I ever see when commentators talk about  Ms. Prejean is from that swimsuit competition.


Donald Trump listens to Miss California, Carrie Prejean, during a Tuesday press conference in which he “let” her keep her crown. The circus atmosphere  distracts from the real problem with marriage.

This whole thing came back into my train of thought as I was scanning the cable channels tonight and fell on … of all shows … Lou Dobbs on CNN. The poor man’s Bill O’Reilly, Dobbs tries this populist approach on his show and it comes across as less than exciting. However, he made a point tonight that perhaps hits the nail on the head when it comes to all this controversy.

He said something that stuck with me: Is same sex marriage the greatest threat to heterosexual marriage? I would go one step further and say its not even in the top ten of threats to the institution of marriage. Whether you believe in same sex marriages or not, I don’t think anyone has to fear gay couples are breaking into the homes of  heterosexual couples nationwide trying to destroy their marriages.

The greatest threats to the union of man and a woman come from drug use, alcoholism, spousal abuse, infidelity, childrens issues  and financial problems. These are the things that have destroyed marriages almost half the time in this country. These causes are insidious and slowly eat away at the fiber of a union between a man and a woman.

It’s a shame this whole thing with Miss California, whose only crime was speaking her mind, is taking our eyes off  the bigger problem. A battle between the left and right over gay marriage will not save heterosexual marriage. In fact, it will continue to destroy it because we are focusing so much on that issue while the institution of marriage between a man and a woman continues to suffer.

It’s my fear that in our country’s continued push to make everything either left or right of the political spectrum, those that live in the middle are not having their problems addressed … and often those are the problems that will ultimately affect us all.

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